Dare I Not Say?
by Malz0rz
Summary: The unfortunate Bulma Briefs is being forced into a life not even worth living. Will she be delivered, or will she be denied what she craves most?


Disclaimer: You're an utter moron if you think I own this commercialized anime.   
  
Author's Note: Okay, I don't know what I'm doing. Well, that's about it. Oh, yeah, I'm sorry to all my readers who liked Those Dark Eyes. I'll finish it one of these days, I promise.   
  
Chapter One  
  
  
  
My life you hold  
  
My life you break   
  
My life for you   
  
For give or take  
  
My life away   
  
My life alone  
  
My life unchanged  
  
And I, a drone  
  
My life now gone   
  
My life now dead  
  
My life released   
  
From in my head  
  
My life you held   
  
My life you broke  
  
My life a dream,   
  
Then I awoke   
  
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"No! Please, stop!" A small three-year-old girl begged a murderous Saiyajin warrior as he began to rape her mother savagely right before her eyes. He had killed her father and everyone else in the building, execpt for her and her unfortunate moma. She didn't know how much longer her mother could stay alive, either. Not very long..   
  
The Saiyajin looked at her evily, his black eyes raging with hate and joy all at the same time, as he slowly killed the woman that meant most to Bulma. "Please, please, please.." Her crys has become a desolate chant. Her tears an ocean streaming down her face, but it was too late. The Saiyajin had raped her mother to death.   
  
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Fifteen years later, a sweaty Bulma jolted upright in her bed, sweating, crying, exhausted. She still had nightmares about that long ago night when she lost everything, when she had seen both her parents killed, blown to peices and raped. She slowly got out of her bed and kneeled down beside it. "Lord, please, rid me of these dreams! Let these thoughts come to pass! I can't do it alone, dear Lord.. I can't, I can't, I can't.." Though she was now Catholic and knew the proper prayers to the Heavenly Father, she still had her chants, her ways of worship.   
  
She stood up, not getting an answer. She would've liked a glass of milk, but it was custom for holy people never to eat or drink anything until after communion which was ... she looked at the clock, reading two in the morning ... three hours away, at five. She groaned. She was starving.   
  
Trying not to be too loud, she tip-toed to her desk, the only other thing in her small room aside from her bed. Opening up the diary that was sitting on it, she began to write..   
  
December, 9, 2003,   
  
I'm still having the nightmare, the one I have every night. It's damaging my faith. It's destroying me. I just can't stop thinking about how it all happened! About why I'm here.. My father, dead, my mother, dead. Why not me? Why didn't they kill me too? I'm greatful to be here at St. Mary's, I am, but I'm so lonely. I just can't stop thinking about it. This has been the plague of my mind, the decaying of my world.   
  
Her mind drifted to right after her mother's death...   
  
The Saiyajin had stood up, looked at her, and smiled. "No, human, it is not your time yet. You're not quite old enough, but believe me, by the time you are, we'll be back, and you will be the one enjoying the act while your precious child watches." She couldn't talk when he had spoken, because she was crying uncontrollably, but she had understood every word he told her. He picked her up and walked outside the house.   
  
"Sir, what do I do with the brat?" He looked at his head officer.   
  
"Why not kill her?" The one higher in command asked, not even glancing at the lower soldier holding the weeping girl. "It's what we normally do, isn't it?"   
  
"Yes sir, but she--" He was interrupted. The girl spoke up. "You will not kill me, assholes! Because when I'm older, I will be the ones to kill you!"   
  
The high commander turned around, shocked. "How old are you, girl?"  
  
She answered less bravely, "Three."   
  
This caught him off guard, never having seen a three-year-old human able to speak in full sentences when they were all but three. "Well now, we don't want those thoughts running in your head." He stated. "We'll have to put you somewhere where they'll be thrown out."   
  
He had someone take her to the nuns, to St. Mary's Church, for her to live. She had been there fifteen years so far, and was a newly called nun, herself. She had lost her family, and had gained God in return. She would never get married, she would never have kids, she would never have se ... She stopped her mind. Three o'clock, she continued to write.   
  
  
  
I've been keeping up with the news lately, and if what they're saying is true, than the Saiyajins will be back. Why, I do not know. All I do know is that the presidents and dictators of the world have signed a pack with the bloody race. They agreed to give them three-hundred vrigins in the world from ages sixteen to twenty, and in return, the Saiyajins will not purge and destroy this planet ... yet. I know I'm going to have to leave. Two F.B.I. officers were here the day before yesterday, and I heard the age group mentioned, and as you know, I am the only one here who fits that age group. I dearly wish Sister Stelle would hide me, keep me safe... she knows what happened, but I know she will not. It would be considered a sin to deceive anyone, even a Saiyajin, and that I know she cannot do. She is much too good for that.   
  
Why do the Saiyajins need us? I simply don't understand, and I wish I did. I wish I had the strength to find the ones that killed my mother and father, and avenge their deaths, but I know I'll never be ablt to do that. No, never kill. Never. I shouldn't even be thinking such evil things, for that makes me as wicked as the ones who committed the crime. Why is my life like this! Why! I've given God everything! Isn't that enough! Oh, please... I need a miracle. I don't want the same thing to happen to me that happened to my mother. I'm scared..   
  
B. B.   
  
Just then, she heard a knock at the door. "Yes?" She asked, "Who is it?"   
  
"Bulma, dear, it's me, Stella." The much older woman replied. "Please let me in."   
  
"Oh, yes ma'am." Bulma went and opened the door for her. "What is it?"   
  
"Honey, I know you've been watching the news secretly.. I haven't told anyone, don't worry." She seen Bulma's worried face. "And I know you know about Earth's deal with the Saiyajin race."   
  
Bulma looked at her, no tears, no emotion. She knew something was about to happen. "Yes." She said simply.   
  
"A guard will be here to escort you to a ship in less than an hour, to go.." The woman was about to die of greif, Bulma could see. This woman had been like a mother to her. "Please, dear, get your things ready.. I'll come for you when it's time."   
  
"Yes, ma'am." Bulma answered depressidly.   
  
"Oh, and honey.. " The older woman said just before she shut the door, "Remember your faith when you get there."   
  
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Bulma got dressed quickly, wearing a basic white dress as she normally did when she wasn't in nun's attire. She packed her few possessions carefully. Her Bible, her rosary beeds, her one-hundred-four diaries, and a few other outfits she had. She stored it all in a capsule that she stuck in a black hand bag. She was ready.   
  
She sat on her bed, praying, until Sister Stella came in. A large Saiyajin man standing behind her. "It is time." Bulma nodded and stood up. She didn't look the warrior in the eyes, as she was taught it wasn't polite, she steadily looked at the floor, her prayers never stopping.   
  
"Follow me." The Sayajin grunted. And she did.   
  
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Meanwhile, far off in outer space, a prince was getting ready for his twenty-first birthday celebration. It would be in less than three hours, and he was more than ready (even though he didn't show his excitement). He walked into the throne room.  
  
"Old man!" The prince yelled, looking for his father. "Where the hell are you?"   
  
"Right here, brat." The king answered gruffly. "What is it?"   
  
"Where are they?" Vegeta couldn't help his harsh words, and he didn't really care, in all honesty. It was his coming of age, and he was ready for it.   
  
"Patience, boy." Is all the king could say. He didn't want to upset his short-tempered son, knowing he was finally old enough to legally over-throw him.   
  
You see, when a Saiyajin male turns twenty-one, he's seen as a man in the eyes of the goverenment and not just a boy. He doesn't have to be under the athority of his parents, and can move out if he chooses. He's also allowed to actually find his for-life mate (not that Vegeta wanted one). Now, this day was also very, very special because it was custom for the boy to be with three-hundred virgins from other planets. It was a sacred ritual.   
  
All they had to do was wait.   
  
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Less than two hours.. Bulma thought to herself. Dear God, deliver me! Please, please God. Do not forsake me..  
  
She with two-hundred-something more women had been taken away from their home planet and were now on a ship heading to a destructive world. Yes, they had been told what they were going to be used for. They were even told that most of them wouldn't live after it happened, because their bodies wouldn't be able to take a Saiyajin's force. They weren't being treated too harshly as one might think, but they weren't getting the greatest treatment, either. Bulma was cramped in a medium sized room with fourty-nine other girls, each beautiful in their own way. They'd all been forced to put on a sheet silk cloth and a small metal bracelet. The clothing they had been wearing was taken away from them.   
  
Bulma seriously didn't like the way the Saiyajins were looking at her. Their eyes hungry, their thoughts lustful. She often wondered what God thought when he looked down on the scenereo. How the hell could he let so much happen to one person, anyway, even after they had devoted their life to him? She just couldn't understand.   
  
One more hour. Girls were starting to pass out, vomit, and put make-up one themselves. From what she could tell, some of them (in their own twisted and disgusting way) were excited and couldn't wait--they hadn't wanted to wait to get married to do what they wanted, anyway. Again, she just couldn't comprehend life. She decided to write in her journal, since her boredom was finally taking her away from her own cynister thoughts.   
  
December, 9, 2003   
  
Here I am again, writing. I don't even know what to say. Why the hell do I write in this? Not like anyone's ever going to see it. I'll probably be dead by next week. I'm on the ship--the Saiyajin Ship. On my way to the planet. Ready for death. I know God's still here, I know he still cares. He's just testing me, yes, that's it. Testing me. All a test. That's all life is... a test.. And you know, I'm tired of being weak. I'm tired of crying every time The Father throws me a curb ball. Jesus did it! He died for me, I shouldn't be scared to feel a bit of intrapment for him. And I'm not. No more tears. Never again.   
  
B.B.  
  
  
  
She had kept the entry short, since she was so nervous she couldn't write very well. Most people had computerized journals, but she usually found it relaxing to write with a pen, but not then, she was way too edgy.   
  
A half a minute.. She waited, waited, waited.   
  
The door opened, and in walked another Saiyajin telling all of them it was time. 


End file.
